Loyalty Is The New Slavery.

Loyalty Is The New Slavery.

From my observation, there was an increased use of the word “loyalty” starting back in 2009. I was in high school and a lot of my classmates and fellow street team members were tattooing the word on their bodies, posting it all over their Myspace pages, or chanting “loyalty is all we ask.” The fad, however, grew to become so much more than that as everyone began to swear by some imaginary code that stood for “Even if I do you dirty, you’re still expected to hold me down.” I’m all for being there for the ones who were there for you, but what I don’t condone is allowing someone to take advantage of you because you don’t want to be disloyal.

The first and most important thing to remember is that everyone around you is using you. The less advanced mind will read that statement as a negative thing when in fact the statement holds whatever truth you apply to it. Think of the characteristics you look for in the people you like to associate yourself with. For me at least, I like to be around people who can make me laugh, people who motivate me, etc. Notice how the key word here is “me”? We look for people to fill both internal and external needs whether knowingly or unknowingly and believe me, when associating with you, others are doing the same. So again, everyone around you is using you for something — that something, however, may or may not always be positive.

The message that I’m trying to convey here is that some people are very strategic when it comes to building relationships.  If you’re known to be someone who’d give away every dollar in their pocket to a friend who “needed” it, then expect for some people to take advantage of that. And I know, it isn’t always easy to spot a leech at first, but the signs are always there. Are you providing yourself and resources way more than what you are receiving in return? Are they supportive of your dreams and keep up to date with the moves you’re making, just as you are aware of their dealings? Better question, can you say, without a doubt that they are as much a friend to you as you are to them? Your answers to these questions should be enough to determine, in my opinion, that you are indeed a slave to loyalty.

Listen, I know there are some people you like to keep around because you don’t want to be wrong about them. But what good is wanting someone around who only wants to be bothered when they think they can benefit from you? The sooner you realize that there are people out here who will value your friendship and or partnership, the better off you’ll be. You have to first be loyal to yourself my darlings, know your worth.

– Yolanda Danae’