Recent Posts
I Took My Time Writing About George Floyd
I took my time writing about George. Not because I didn’t have thoughts worth sharing, but because George was different. George was family to a very good friend of mine and I didn’t want my profile adding to the stream of images and hashtags already flooding his timeline. Against my better judgment, I watched the video. I watched a Black Man die in broad day light… on camera… at the hands of police… again.
Continue reading I Took My Time Writing About George Floyd
I Lost Track of Time.
I didn’t realize how much time had gone by since I last checked in with you guys.
November 6th, a Wednesday. I had felt myself slowly drifting back into that familiar darkness for weeks but decided I’d stay in the light, smile, engage, and make every effort to be ok.
Continue reading I Lost Track of Time.
Remembering John “Pops” Witherspoon
The world is in shock right now as recent news reports confirm the passing of comedian and actor John Witherspoon, 77.
Continue reading Remembering John “Pops” Witherspoon
Today I Turn 27
I wrote this a couple of hours before my 27th birthday. Just in case my mood found a way to spill over into today, I wanted to have this handy.
On days where I really struggle. When stress has made a mess of my face. When anxiety causes frequent trips to the bathroom so my coworkers aren’t tempted to ask what’s wrong. When I start my day feeling like no one here deserves me and I’d be better suited staying in bed not being anything to anyone except me but only for myself.
This list is for those times… these times. Because even though they don’t last forever, they always find their way back.
1. Working limbs.
2. Steady pay.
3. Family — even when they’re the source of my frustration.
4. Higher awareness of self, in all regard.
5. The ability to get sh*t done. Even when it hurts. Even when I’m broken.
6. Being able to Goblet squat and one arm thrust 35 pounds. (Thanks Coach Moe)
7. Recognizing when its time to let go, even if only temporarily. (See you April 18th for Cocktail Conversations)
8. The gift of writing and all of those who’ve challenged me to push beyond the limits I give myself.
9. Racine McGee for all the moments we share. Especially the ones where its you doing the ear tugging. I be listening.
10. An ever improving relationship with my supervisor. I appreciate the teach and learn moments we share, the random check-ins, and the pep talks we give to one another. The dots are connecting finally and I recognize that being on this team with you has done a lot for me personally and professionally.
11. I appreciate those closest to me that take the beatings on my bad days and still show up with an open heart when I come to my senses and say, “I’m sorry for yelling at you.”
12. Strangers. As much as hate to admit it, I’m a stranger magnet. I’ve met some pretty cool ones this past year. Most recently my Lyft driver, Jean, who I invited to a Lil Wayne concert after being in the car for less than 60 seconds.
13. Black Men. My Black Men. You know who you are. Thank you for keeping me safe, for reminding me of my light, and pulling my card when I start trippin’ over f*ck boys.
14. Black Women. My Black Women. Again, you know who you are. Thank you for understanding, for loving on me when I need it, and for a genuine sense of sisterhood.
15. Every single person that has ever said “I see you.” That statement holds so much power, especially on days I feel invisible.
16. My Ancestors. The source of my strength and my foundation. There is absolutely nothing in this world I cannot do with you all on my side. Give thanks.
17. A place to comfortably lay my head.
18. Muffin. My baby love, my heart in (kitten) form.
19. Breaks from the world.
20. Vegan food that tastes good when I cook it myself.
21. Sunsets + Sunrises and their symbolism of both rise and rest
22. Health insurance. Even though I refuse to use it, after 26, I’m grateful to have it — just in case.
23. Toxic people that come into my life as a mirror. I have some sh*t to work on too, thank you for showing me that.
24. Clean water. There are still thousands of people throughout the City of Newark and millions of people in low-income communities across the U.S. without access to clean water. Our collective efforts must continue even as water distribution to those who need it slows down.
25. Today only, I’m claiming 27. Tomorrow I’ll go back to being 25.
26. Second chances
27. Another trip around the sun for myself and for those who’s legacy I carry on.
Today I turn 27 and I’m just grateful to still be here.
Yolanda Danae’
Cocktail Conversations – The Experience
The Cocktail Conversations experience is for those who want to actively be part of solutions to issues within their respective communities. On October 5th we’ll be speaking with children of addicts, individuals in recovery, addiction counselors and treatment professionals.
Continue reading Cocktail Conversations – The Experience
The Marathon Continues
For nearly two weeks, the world has been in a state of shock and disbelief. That first night, I stayed up until after 3am reading every post on my timeline. It was too much to deal with so for the first time in a longtime, I logged out of not just my personal accounts, but out of The Sassy Rant accounts as well. The way I saw it, I’d be gone until I had something to say.
Continue reading The Marathon Continues
National Women and Girls HIV Awareness Day
Today we visited the @NJCRI for National Women and Girls HIV Awareness Day / International Women’s Day. We and several other women shared stories of self-care + wellness, abuse, addiction, and the importance of safe sex practices. We ask that you take a moment to acknowledge the women in your lives and let them know today and everyday that they are appreciated! Continue reading National Women and Girls HIV Awareness Day
Thoughts of Nia…
Coming up under the shield of my elders, I would have never imaged that the world would be filled with so much hatred. Not even Hollywood’s most goriest of films could have prepared me for the horrific scenes of men and women murdered in cold blood that I’ve witnessed in real time. Yet, here I am at 26 years old with memories of violent crimes against people who look like I do, burned into my mind forever. Today, my heart aches for Nia Wilson in the same way it aches for Sandra, Tamir, Sean, Trayvon, Eric, Philandro, and so many others who’s names become merely a faded hashtag on a sign in someones garage, on someone’s page, in someone’s mind. Nia, we will shout your name amongst those slain in this county by the hands of hate-filled racists. We will fight for justice. We will remember your name.
– Yolanda Danae’ Continue reading Thoughts of Nia…
Visibility
Often, I credit my work with The Sassy Rant, both blog and brand, to being something just for myself. And to some extent, that’s still a very accurate narrative. When you aren’t motivated by the majority, you have this sort of autonomy to produce authentic content. I love what I do, and the unfiltered creative freedom I’ve been afforded. And while I’d still do this with no one watching, it always warms my heart when someone says, “I see you.” Continue reading Visibility
Throw The Whole ‘Friend’ Away
For the most part, we have a working knowledge of the role we play in people’s lives, especially those we call our friends. We could be the one they call when they’re having money problems, or the one that comes to the rescue in a time of crisis. That said, we know who to call on when we’re in certain moods or have certain issues going on, just like we know who to expect a call from and when. At some point though, a person’s need for your role will change — with or without notice. Continue reading Throw The Whole ‘Friend’ Away
Since You’ve Been Asking…
A lot of times, I wish I had more to say. More experiences to share, more advice to give. But the truth is, I sometimes feel like I’m running out of content. You know that moment when you’re on a plane and the stewardess is passing out coffee? They’re getting closer to you, but it seems as if there’s just way too many passengers in the way? Finally, when it’s your turn, you reach out your cup in excitement and down trickles remnants of a once full pot of Joe. I feel like with this blog, I’m at my last few drops, leaving you all disappointed when you hold out your cup. Continue reading Since You’ve Been Asking…
The First Annual Cocktail Conversations!
Can we just raise a glass and toast to the success that became of Cocktail Conversations? The food and drinks were great, but the conversation was indeed the icing on the cake! Though this event took a lot of planning and preparation, the turnout by far exceeded my expectations! (I really didn’t intend for this to rhyme) Continue reading The First Annual Cocktail Conversations!
Sometimes, I Don’t Feel Like Listening
My friends know I love them like they’re family. In all honesty, some of them are more family to me than my own blood relatives. Before I get into this rant, don’t take it personal. Please spare me the text messages saying things like “I didn’t know this was a problem” or “I’ll stop bothering you” etc. This is less about you all and more about me. So again, don’t take it personal. Continue reading Sometimes, I Don’t Feel Like Listening
Vertical Joe’s: A Professional Woman’s Playground
As some of you may already know by now, I took a solo trip to Atlanta a few weeks ago. One of the things I promised myself I’d do was take a pole dancing class at the infamous Vertical Joe’s. Yes, this anti-social introvert jumped — or should I say slid completely out of her comfort zone *flips hair*! It’s no secret that I’m the last person to initiate change or try anything new, but, as part of my 25 by 25 (bucketlist), I promised myself that I’d use this year to not only boss up, but to try some things that would shock not only my friends but myself as well. Continue reading Vertical Joe’s: A Professional Woman’s Playground
Mr. Perfect
In a recent conversation with an acquaintance, I was told that I’d always be single because I require too much. I was informed that because of my “high maintenance attitude” I would never find the perfect man, since that’s what it seems I’m in search of. In all honestly, perfection is just a fragment of one’s imagination. In that regard, perhaps I am waiting to be swept off of my feet by the imaginary man that frequents my daydreams. Maybe the man that comes to find mind when singing along to Brian McKnight, Ginuwine, and Dru Hill, is who has me clicking my heels in anticipation. Either way, he’s not perfect, and that I believe, is what is most alluring about this mystery man. Continue reading Mr. Perfect
Despite What I May Say, Sometimes I’m Not Okay
Someone once told me that the biggest lie we tell is when people ask how we’re doing. Whether we are keeping our heads above water or being pulled under, more times than not, we’ll respond with “I’m fine.” Today’s rant is one I’ve been a little apprehensive about posting. While I’m always honest with my readers and try my hardest to be as transparent as I’m comfortable with being, this topic is one I’ve only ever disclosed to a very select group of people. I’ve found that when trying to share my thoughts, I’m often dismissed and told things like “it’ll pass,” “pray about it,” “you shouldn’t feel that way,” and the list goes on. But what happens when it doesn’t pass, and prayer isn’t working, and you do feel this way? Then what? Continue reading Despite What I May Say, Sometimes I’m Not Okay
Loyalty Is The New Slavery.
From my observation, there was an increased use of the word “loyalty” starting back in 2009. I was in high school and a lot of my classmates and fellow street team members were tattooing the word on their bodies, posting it all over their Myspace pages, or chanting “loyalty is all we ask.” The fad, however, grew to become so much more than that as everyone began to swear by some imaginary code that stood for “Even if I do you dirty, you’re still expected to hold me down.” I’m all for being there for the ones who were there for you, but what I don’t condone is allowing someone to take advantage of you because you don’t want to be disloyal. Continue reading Loyalty Is The New Slavery.
QueensKnow Pop-Up Shop & Panel Discussion Recap!
As you all know, this past weekend I visited Somerville, Massachusetts to speak on panel hosted by a dear friend and Founder of QueensKnow, Keisha Jean-Louis. Early Saturday morning, I packed up the car and hit the road for the nearly four hour drive. Hopefully you’re following @TheSassyRant on InstaGram and were able to keep up with some of our posts from the event. If not, keep reading, this recap is full of details! Continue reading QueensKnow Pop-Up Shop & Panel Discussion Recap!
10 Things To Remember When Following Your Dreams
It’s an amazing thing to watch someone live in their passion. In a way, it’s actually inspiring and often gives us the extra push we need to step away from our fear and follow our dreams. This burst of motivation puts you on an extreme high… that is, until something or someone comes along and knocks you off your cloud. But not to worry, we’ve come up with a list of tips/things to remember to help keep you on track when things get a little rocky. Be sure to keep this going by sharing with your friends and adding your own tips to the list. Continue reading 10 Things To Remember When Following Your Dreams
‘Forever’ Is The Problem
Ladies, when you hear the word “forever” what’s some things that come to mind? Personally, what instantly flashes in my head is marriage because that’s something that’s supposed to be forever, right? Fellas tell me this, how soon is too soon to be considering forever with someone? A year into dating exclusively? Eight months? Well, what if I told you that there are some women who are checking you out on the first date to see if you fit the surface check? You’re probably wondering what on earth is the surface check, right? Well, keep reading. Continue reading ‘Forever’ Is The Problem
Happy 1st Birthday to The Sassy Rant!
One year ago today, The Sassy Rant was born! In honor of this wonderful occasion, I’d like introduce you to our new home, TheSassyRant.com ! Continue reading Happy 1st Birthday to The Sassy Rant!
Hello August
July was rough for many people, myself included. Hopefully August is better. Let’s dive in.
When Will The Games End?
The question we all ask ourselves from time to time. Well, I may have an answer for you…
It’s Not True Because I Don’t Believe It
“You keep falling victim cause you’re insecure… And when I tell you that you’re beautiful you can’t be sure” – J. Cole
Time To Take Back…
People will take and take and take until you have nothing left. And why is that you may ask? Because we continue to give. It isn’t them, it’s us. Continue reading Time To Take Back…
Can Men And Women Be Just Friends?
It’s an age-old question that is still being debated to this very day; can two people of the opposite sex have a strictly platonic relationship without having any romantic interest in one another? Well, that depends. Continue reading Can Men And Women Be Just Friends?
#BraizeSeason: In The Land of Korruption 2
As many of you may know, yesterday hip hop lyricist and Newark native King Braize released one of the most anticipated projects of the year, “In The Land of Korruption 2.” The mixtape is a continuation of Braize’s third solo project, “In The Land of Korruption” which includes some of my faves like “Astor Quitman Music,” “Unnoticed,” and “Welcome 2 Da Jungle.” Before we jump into my top five favorites on this new project, take a moment to watch the mixtape’s single, “That’s Bae” feat. Jelahn Kruze. Continue reading #BraizeSeason: In The Land of Korruption 2
Amirah, My Darling Angel
I’m not okay.
As much as I try to pretend like I am, I’m not.
None of us are. You were such a beautiful, loving, and selfless young woman, and it hurts beyond what words can describe that you’re gone. Believe me Favee, your absence is felt and your presence will be greatly missed and always remembered. Continue reading Amirah, My Darling Angel
When People Show You Who They Are…
Believe them the first time. One of the hardest lessons you’ll ever learn in life is that not everyone you’re holding on to is supposed to be a part of your long term journey. No matter how much time and energy you invest in to a situation, friendship or relationship, when things are constantly going wrong, take it for what it is and move on. Let go of the excuses of why you have to hold on and realize that the lesson will continue to be harder for you to learn when you refuse to acknowledge it. Continue reading When People Show You Who They Are…